Title? Unfair is all that comes to mind.
Thursday, July 8, 2010 at 7:44AM Things have been crazy hectic busy.
Last weekend included a catering job for 100 and I was also contracted to organize sponsorships and manage / run the bar services for the entertainment tent at our community's largest annual festival, Privateer Days. We slung drinks out to at least 1000 people. I slept and tweeted very little. The lovely Kate Inglis was even there for a reading of the Dread Crew and I was so busy I didn't have a minute to stop by and say hello. The B&B was even full.
Make hay while the sun shines right? At least last week was good for that. I was grateful for the distractions to be honest...
You see, last week also delivered a crotch-punch. My mom was diagnosed with Acral Lentiginous Melanoma last Monday. My mom has cancer.
It's rare, but rarer still is that the cancer is most often seen in asian, first nation and black ethnic groups, not caucasians. And, it's location (bottom of her foot) is most often seen in black ethnicities. It's what killed Bob Marley. My mom, has a rare form of a rare cancer. On top of that, melanoma is the worst kind of skin cancer you can get.
Fuck.
I said that a lot last week. I also cried a lot.
Twitter was a thousand levels of awesome and let me cry on its collective shoulder. I can't tell you how much I needed that and how it has helped me be the rock my mom needs right now. THANK YOU wonderful twitter friends!
Thanks to divine intervention, my mom had the lesion surgically removed yesterday. At least, her surgeon said he has removed what he can and won't know for sure if the surgery went well until her follow up appouintment on August 18th where he will look for satelite lesions. She may need another procedure to remove radial tissue. She may also need to have some proceedure that involves dye injected into the lymph nodes in her leg to see if it has spread.
I'm trying to focus (and keep my mom focused) only on what we know. Thinking of the what ifs is too damn scary. The surgeon said yeterday that melanoma is best treated by removal. If it has spread to her lungs, then the spot(s) need to be cut out. If it spreads to her bones or brain? Well I don't want to talk about that.
What I know is this: my mom has no other lesions on her body and feels like a relatively healthy 66 year old, she has had the lesion (or at least most of it) removed. We will know within a few weeks what the prognosis is. Until then, I can only have confidence in her medical team and hope that the universe is looking out for my mom.
Oddly, my mother had a weird dream the night before the surgery. In her dream, her foot was bandaged (as it is today, post proceedure) and her parents were there. Her dad was holding her foot and looking at it. What's weird about that? My grandmother died in 1992 and my grandfather died in 1981.
Keep my mom in your thoughts please. I need her.
Also, please check yourself and your loved ones for spots. Check the WHOLE body, not just bits exposed to the sun. I learned last week that skin cancer doesn't have to be caused by the sun. But wear sunscreen anyway ok? Because this sucks.
Reader Comments (9)
Sending you so much love and hugs!!
I am keeping you and your mom in my thoughts and prayers all day today. I will pray that he got it all the the 'rare' part of this diagnosis is done and that no other lesions or procedures are needed. I had an uncle that died from melanoma, so I understand your fear. I just wanted you to know you are in my thoughts.
Thinking of you both. Be strong, rest up and as you say, concentrate on what you know now, not the what-ifs.
Much love,
M xx
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Been thinkning about you. Sending love, hugs, and tons of good vibes for your mom Karen. I am really hopeful that they got it all and you guys can move forward from here. xo
I approved of the previous title of this post :)
This is waaaaaay too much to handle, lady. Sorry that this is happening. We just visited with a friend who had lesions removed from his back a few months ago. Scary but so hopeful for him & your mum.
I'm so sorry I missed this last week, we've been away most of the past couple weeks. I hope your mom continues to recover and that no spots return at all - EVER. This stuff is really scary, I have seen friends go through it at young ages and can't believe it. Hang in there.
I hate to miss Privateer Days - haven't been there for it since three years ago I think (I was home for the LRHS 50th reunion). We usually do our vacation mid-end July so it never coincides with that weekend. Good for you for being so involved - but bet you were pretty damn tired :)
I am popping over from The Bloggess and was reading your archives.
Just wanted to let you know that I had melanoma last year. At 36. With twin 3 year old boys and a young husband. 2009 was not a good year.
Finding it and dealing with it quickly is 90% of the battle. But it also means YOU are now at higher risk of developing melanoma. As is anyone directly related to your mother. Write down any weird spots and keep tabs on them. Check a full body check by a professional. Skin cancer is almost 100% treatable if found early!
And yes, wear sunscreen!
So sorry you are going through this. I feel like only now am I recovering from it all.
PS. The irony of all of this is I made it through a twin pregnancy with NO stretch marks then I had melanoma on my stomach, resulting in large scars! You have to laugh!