The Christmas Wish
Monday, December 20, 2010 at 3:51PM Wednesday night I could hear my mom struggling in the bathroom. Throwing up has become a recent normality, but I could hear her through the walls that night and that hasn't happened before.
I woke early in the morning sensing something was wrong and found her crying in her bed. She couldn't breathe right. I told her I was taking her to the hospital. Now.
What unfolded over the next four days was nothing short of terrible and nerve wracking.
X-ray showed a backed up bowel, blood tests showed something wonky with her liver. She was admitted in an effort to discover just what was causing this new pain and try another route to manage her pain.
The percocet really wasn't cutting it.
Enter morphine and the charming side effects of nausea and constipation.
My mom was given laxatives and little promise that she'd beon her planned flight to Toronto on Sunday. Everyone seemed to be striving toward that goal though.
I wasn't too scared until Saturday morning. Another round of blood work, the pain, incessant gagging and vomiting indicated that a CT scan was needed. Worries were: gall stones; bowel obstruction and spread of the cancer. My mom was desperate to get to Toronto. I prayed that whatever it was, it wouldn't be something that needed surgery or otherwise threaten her plans. For some time, my mom has looked at this trip as a final pilgrimage. She had to go.
On Saturday evening, our worst fears were confirmed though. The cancer is in her liver. Quite prolifically too. What's astounding to me is that her organs were clear in October. Now her liver is full of cancer.
So, the doctor asked what she wanted to do and my mom did just what she wanted; she left for Toronto last night.
And I've been a lost mess ever since.
I don't get there until Thursday and my mother's friend told me today that she's refusing to eat anything. What's worse is, she was asleep when I called and I won't feel any better until I talk to HER.
I know exactly where my mom is at and I'm trying to remain calm and not assume things are slipping even more on the opinion of her friend. This stuff is all new to her... I will know when to worry, but I need to talk to her first.
I hope she's just worn out from all the drama the last few days.
I can't wait to get there. To hug her and help her have a really great Christmas with her family. Her one special wish.
Send strength, courage and positive healing energy please. We've never needed it more.
Reader Comments (3)
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry you are going thru this. But your Mom seems to know what she wants. She sounds like a strong lady. My thoughts, prayers, and Buddha-belly rubs are all focused on you and your family this holiday. xoxo
Oh honey. I'm so very sorry to hear this news. Have been keeping you & your mom in my prayers. One of my best friends just got diagnosed w/the same thing, cancer all through her liver. Keeping you in my positive thoughts. xxoo
I wish I could do something more than just make wishes :-( As always, good luck to you and your mum. May the new year bring you better times.