This is what I get for staying on top of housework.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009 at 11:24AM So yesterday morning, I was in rare multi-tasking form. Not only did I manage getting myself and my child dressed and prepped for the greatness that is Monday, I also decided to fit in a little domestic operational management too.
Just before heading downstairs, I started sorting out a load of laundry to toss in the wash. As I was bending over, I felt this insanely HOT pain in my right thigh; a fiery jab, followed by another, then another, causing me to drop my pile of clothes to the floor and figure out why an INFERNO was erupting on my leg. Stupidly, I expected a pin or something. But instead, I looked down to see a massive creature tumble off my leg and onto the floor; it was H-U-G-E. Something BIT me!
My eyesight’s not the best and my floors are dark, so at first, it looked a LOT like a tarantula spider . Then I thought, maybe it IS a tarantula. Maybe I was cursed by some ancient tikki idol – just like that time on the Brady Bunch; remember THAT 3-part cliff hanger? I totally thought that tarantula was going to attack and kill Peter.
Then I remembered that I haven't been anywhere near an idol don’t even know anyone that’s been to Hawaii recently and no tarantula wants to live in the cold tundra that is Canada. So I looked again and realized it was actually one of these suckers.
A hornet… a giant freaking hornet! STUNG me. Like 3 times. It wasn’t *quite* as big as this one though:
And did I tell you it hurt? O-U-C-H! This Pain Index - describes the pain better than me.
So then, in my poison venom induced stupor, I have a moment of clarity and stomp on it before it can inflict more pain or tries to kill me. Then I think maybe I should keep it. You know, incase I die and it needs to go in for lab tests as part of my autopsy.I could be allergic people! I was stung once by a wasp in 1986 without a reaction; but this was a mutant hornet!
I was starting to get all the symptoms of anyphalactic shock– my throat was all dry and my heart was racing and my leg was ballooning up… well ok, maybe I just had a little red spot... and I guess the debilitating inability to breathe mild hyperventilating is just from being a total hypochondriac. I told Chris just incase though.
Worst part of thinking you’re dying from a hornet sting? The reminder stingy sensations and leg stiffness, plus I had the creepy crawlies all day. But, I’ve survived 24 hours. I didn’t even need to be rushed to the hospital. But that totally almost happened.
And I STILL got that load of laundry done.
I know, I am awesome.
Reader Comments (3)
ACK!
Glad you're okay!
First bitten by the blogging bug (Post 1) and then bitten by an actual bug (Post 2)! Yikes! You might need to wear Raid as perfume. :)
Seriously, glad you're okay!
Well, I guess its more stung than bitten in this post. Oh well...same advice applies.